Confession: They say that age is only a number, and that maturity comes with age. In this story, a young man finds his missing rib at a party. However, he faces opposition when he decides to marry this tender, loving, but older woman.
My name is Chizoba and the story I am about to tell is that of a couple who triumphed in marriage in spite of age difference. This is my story: I was a young man fighting a war of survival. I came from an ignorant and illiterate family background but with strong will to survive.
Some felt I was snobish to the opposite sex who sought my friendship, but it was a self-check mechanism to keep girls at bay.
Then there was this neighbour who I met at a party one Easter Monday. When she first introduced herself to me as Beauty, she gave me such a lovely smile that I had to admit that she was beautiful just like her name. said.
Beauty was seven years older than me but I didn’t mind because I was already in love with her. We had danced and talked during the party and noted that we had one thing in common which was the fact that we could really dance well, in addition to my humorous disposition. So we stuck together.
What went in her favour was that she was not arrogant. She was humble and had a generous disposition. We became friends against my friends’ expectations that I go for a younger person when they thought our friendship was getting too close for comfort.
Unlike other ladies who usually took from me, this lady was always ready to profer solutions to problems. When I became a student in a polytechnic, she was there for me. From time to time, she wrote this kind of lovely poems for me:
I may not have the prettiest face for you to look at
Or the skinniest waist for you to hold but I do promise
The biggest heart to love you with. Every night when I look at the moon, it reminds me of you,
how you can see the same moon. It makes me sometimes sad
because I can see the moon, but I can´t see you. I miss you lot my dear love.
As we grow older together, As we continue to change with age, There is one thing that will never change. . .
I will always keep falling in love with you.
I took you as my friend and locked you
in my heart. Now the key is missing
But I’m happy because
You are safe in my heart till my
heart beats stop.
She also told me cute love stories like this:
Two Butterflies
Were In Love.
One Day They
Decided To Play
Hide N Seek,
They Fixed A
Flower And Decided That
Tomorrow The One Who Will Come
First And Sit On This Flower
Will Love The Other More.
At Morning The Male Butterfly Came
Very Early
And Waited For The Flower To Open.
When It Opened,
He Was Shocked To See That,
The Female Butterfly Had Died Inside It,
Because She Was Waiting Since Last
Night To Tell Him…
How much she loves him.
When I was still trying to take a decision on whether to marry my wife or not because of the age difference, I received some pieces of advice from some wise and elderly people. First, they said that there is no ideal age difference. It all depends on what you want.
A woman your age or older tends to act more mature than you but it doesn’t matter because you can grow to love and be compatible with each other. Second, age difference in marriage is a personal thing.
And those who think that a man will pamper a woman if he is older than her are wrong because marriage is not built on pampering. It dwells more on compatibility because two cannot work together except there is an agreement between them.
There is no guarantee that being married to an older man is an assurance that one’s marriage will work out perfectly. These older men were once young people and being old doesn’t necessarily mean that one is wiser, although in most cases maturity comes with age.
I strongly believe that maturity comes with time or age. So in this respect, as the young husband grows older, he also grows in maturity (except there’s something wrong with him mentally).
Although there is no stipulated age difference between a man and a woman who have agreed to live as man and wife, I believe that a man should be the head of the family since according to the Scriptures, a man remains the head of the family irrespective of the fact that he may be the older or younger partner in the marriage. A woman’s role in the marriage is basically that of a helpmate, irrespective of her age. The truth is that it’s not easy for a woman to be submissive to a man, whether she is older than him or not.
But some people say that it would be harder for a woman to be submissive to her husband if she realises that she is older than him. However, if a woman truly loves her man and has a sense of maturity, she will be submissive to her younger lover. So, it depends on the woman’s level of maturity.
Again, being submissive is not dependent on having a younger or older lover but depends on good upbringing. If a woman is from a good home, she will be submissive to her husband. But if she is not from a good home, she may not be submissive. If she’s not the submissive type, challenges may arise.
But then, if you are convinced that she’s the one for you, I see no reason both of you shouldn’t get married. It all depends on how you can properly manage the challenges you face. As long as both of you are happy with each other and okay with it, there will really be no problem. So, that was how my relationship with the love of my life until she became pregnant for me.
That sealed it even though my elder sister was against our getting married because of the age difference. My mum was with me, after all as her only son she wanted me to get married quickly and give her grandchildren.
Later my sweetheart gave birth to a baby girl. I was still a student. So, we had to take the initiative of meeting her relatives who took me in as their son. There was no going back.
The two families agreed to solemniswe the relationship that turned out to be a reference point of what marriage should be inspite of the age difference.
That’s because she gives me due respect. She has been a good wife to me for more than three decades. We have lived in bliss as husband and wife with four wonderful children. We have now left government service and are now managing a small business together to the glory of God
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